2012 New Year New Resolution

While waiting for my dear friend, I shall kill the boredom by updating my blog. I really think a lot and enjoy thinking a lot when I got nothing to do.

Have you ever ask yourself what you really want in life?

My answer: Always!

1) loan free
2) financial freedom
3) able to provide for my family things that they never thought of buying for themselves
4) a nice sports car
5) perhaps own a few properties

To achieve this, it equates to a lot of hard-work, opportunity and luck. All these years, I’ve been trying hard to achieve but I always fail due to the lack of determination. Perhaps, is time to think harder. I’m always trying ways to seek for a better life, and grabbing opportunities. Maybe that’s why i ended up like a job hopper. Friends & family may think that I gave up too easily in achieving the things I previously set. For me, I think that I’m fine tuning the ways towards my goal.

Besides money, I also want to do things more meaningful. Actually, I’m quite happy as a property agent for being able to earn and at the same time helping family to have a shelter above their head. It is even more encouraging if I get positive feedback from my buyers and sellers. On top of that, they refer their friends and family back me to. Speechless- satisfaction.

I couldn’t find it here. (now)
Boss is very nice. Colleagues are superb. I can’t bring myself to let the boss to know my intention. On the other hand, I know this job is definitely not what I want in long term.

Anyway, I will bring my courage and talk about it soon.

Currently, I’ve got a career in mind. Decision is not concrete yet. If I start this, I make sure this is the final career path.

New year new resolution.
No.1 Building a career
No.2 work out more
No.3 more family time

3 goals for next year.. Weeeeeeeee….

I live with no regrets..

I so enjoy having my own place, despite doing more housework. Lumpy and I get to spend more time together too. But still, there is no best of both world. I miss my family.

Work wise is really tiring & enjoying. Must be thinking how can “tiring” & “enjoying” coincide. Anyway, I can’t find any satisfaction in my job and that makes work tiring. It also seems to have no breakthrough. Well,bosses are nice and the only thing i look forward to work are my colleagues. Actually, I no longer categorize them as colleagues but good friends cause they really brighten my days and i so love them.

So, what more can i ask? Me, as a normal human can never be satisfied. I just need more time to sleep, more freedom and do things more meaningful. Can that be acheived? I will keep seeking, keep trying till i get it right.

May updates

I joke with lumpy that my dad requested him to call him dad! I guess it is really difficult to open the darn bloody mouth to call someone else dad and mum. It is easy to address others as your sister la, brother la, good friend la, best friend la. But I really cant get away the awkward feeling to bring myself to address someone as my dad or mum. Is something really personal! Anyway, in no time (September) by hook or by crook I must accept this fact and tune my mindset.

I frequently get people asking me. “How’s your new job? ”

First of all, I must say I really feel blessed because people here are helpful and really nice to me. I must say I quite like the people here. Somehow or rather i like the working environment, such that it is fast paced and i enjoy feeling occupied with work stuff.

Come to think of it, I somehow miss my ERA colleagues and I hope they still remember me.

Empty Shell

Wolf in a sheep’s cloth; crocodile tears, are simply a few of the best description of a KIND of human. This kind of human usually potrays a good image, a good role, a good heart. But in actual fact, they are full of hidden agenda. A best word i could find to best describe them is “Cunning”. Once they know their trick wouldn’t work on someone or that someone is of no use, they turn their back and give that someone a hard time.

I have to admit that it requires alot of wisdom and intelligence to be a wolf. I have to salute him for that. He manipulates people, and make people listens to him. I have to salute him for this too.

However, I don’t buy his trick. I almost fall into his trap, somehow or rather, Im blessed and got out of it. I simply just do not want to be another puppet of his. Now that i had stepped out of the trap, I’ve see things much more clearer. At the very beginning, i felt that i’ve let him down. Gradually i felt that he is indirectly going against me. And now, I can conclude that he is really going against me.

Sometimes i wonder, why would someone so rich and successful wants to go against a small fly like me? Recently, i got an answer. Yes, he drives good car and being perceived as a successful person with financial freedom. Are the stuff charged by credit card or borrow $$$ from someone? I guess if it is made to public, he will have a BIG EGO BRUISED. What’s with having good things using other’s money? Do you feel great owning this stuff? Come’on stop acting you are well doing.. it makes me puke. I know now im simply of no use to him, he tries to hurt me again and again. Please! leave a “real sheep” like me alone. I never want to get involve with such person like you. I am not your match because i am not as cunning as you. =p

I will not get myself involved with him but is sad that some people around him are people that i dear. I just hope they will not get hurt, someday, or even when his tricks were exposed.

wear out

It is really a busy busy busy season for me. No joke concentrating studies and managing work at the same time. My school work is driving me crazy. Sleeping early in the morning 5/6am was terror. I do not want a life like an owl. Time just simply crawl like nobody’s business. I thought by stopping flying, it can help to cure my insomia but it seems that I really have sleeping disorder. Sleeping at weird, long and wee hours! So much so of complaining YET I still like doing stuff at night. Though i like crowds (in the day) but sometime i do enjoy being alone at night.

Having my own space, listen to myself.

Again! School work is driving me crazy!!! This month is Assignments, test and EXAM season! By the way, I was shock and happy to get quite a high mark for my law test. Hopefully, i can score well for my law assignment and soar for a distinction for this (dreaming again).

When it comes to work, or even social situation. Ive realised that it is not JUST about the money that gives me the satisfaction. I enjoy making people happy. This is the kind of satisfaction I want! And im enjoying it!

farmers

I am really very lazy. Trying my best to acheive my will power i used to have. I finally got my butt off and went farming ALONE! Used up 600 flyers today. I want to aim to give out 1000 flyers a day. Hopefully with hard work there is result.

Another presentation tomorrow! Hope my angels will be with me.

Chirping Bird

I’ve realised my blog is all about ranting and grumbling. That reflect so bad about myself. I only like to blog when i feel that no one understands me and somehow i have to speak it out to feel better.

I will try to write down more happy moments to remind myself that i am fortunate. I felt happy whenever I purposely drive pass my new house. Is 15 STOREY TALL now! At the same time i feel inferior of the amount of money to spend.

Yesterday, a small young bird flew into my house. My brother and his girlfriend wanted to keep it. DUE to hungry ghost festival, the superstitious DAD refused to let them keep. With no choice, they have to FREE THE BIRD. The poor little bird didn’t want to fly away. It stood nicely and slept on my brother’s middle finger. They went all the way to bishan park to set it free (Still on my brother’s finger).

Emo

Really feel fuck up with whats going on right now. Why must I have a life controlled by others. I just wish i shouldn’t care too much about others. BUT i can’t!

Appearing selfish is what others say about me.. if either decision is made. There is no way of compromising. Follow my heart is easy to be said than do. But my heart is in a huge confusion. So whose the selfish one right now?

I’m really too emotional and not a good decision maker.
At times, I hated myself.
I don’t want to be a puppet anymore.

I heart Lumpy, friends and colleague

6 years ups and down. Lumpy proposed. Was surprised and didn’t expect this to come this fast. I will aim to be a good wife. I really heart him! Thanks for everything he did for me and my friends’ blessing.

As for work, i really enjoy working with my colleagues. Never ending teasing and laughter made everyday bright. Going through tough time and battles, With continuos focus and hardwork, i believe all of us will make it. Another deal closed, more committement have to be made. Currently, I’m feeling really contradicted. I respect my current manager, and he really has a big heart. Somehow i feel sorry that i couldn’t made myself to stick to him and the other side is pressing me to change. BUT the other side is giving me all the favour. ???? Contradict!

Comes to studies! I heart my classmates! Supportive and unselfishness. Feel blessed! I really owe them a big favour.

and lastly, i guess some idiotic construction workers knock on my xiao bai.

Just feel like blogging

First thing, my studies. Assignments are adding on stress to me. And I’ve concluded that I really hate studying. I’ve just send another email to my course coordinator and murdoch in charged that I wanted to change to single major regardless. Ultimately my aim to study is to get a degree and move on. Moreover I don’t see myself working in hotel line in future. Why waste the time? Hah.

Work is getting more optimising! I like my job. I’ve learned that money is REALLY the root of all evil. Just hope that i will not turn evil someday. Somehow I feel is my brought up, I rather lose out than to let others lose. Looks like this is not a very good attribute of becoming a good sales person. I am still looking at what I can improve on. Sometimes i see myself like no other agents out there. I rather forgo $$$ than to see others in misery. I’m really a confuse kid. I have to constantly remind myself that im working for money, not doing charity.